- I was out of the country visiting family for 10 days
- my husband was home on his own (without scheduled custody)
- there was a big boxing match on PPV on Saturday night
- the ex-wife's TV doesn't work AND she knows no boundaries
- there was a pizza party in my living room with 2 teenagers and their bio-parents
Welcome home! After nearly 2 weeks away, I get home to 2 grumpy (as usual) teenagers lounging on the couch, shoes on the coffee table et al., which was fine. I was happy to see them as was my 3 year old, despite being received by a couple grunts and being brushed off like a bothersome fly. The next day my husband and I had date-night to reconnect and catch up after being apart for over 10 days.
SURPRISE! While at sushi, my loving and albeit, oblivious, husband casually mentions how his ex-wife had come to OUR aka MY house while I was out of town, to watch a boxing match. Yeah, exactly. WTF? To my husband it was such a non-issue that he didn't mention it until then since he didn't think I would 'react'. Which I tried so hard not to... therapist suggest I match my reaction to the action and so I just sat, silently crying at a sushi bar. I didn't know what to do, say other than "I need time to process this..." After a few harsh exchanges and 2 days of silence, we hugged it out. We're both sorry but neither of us was to blame. The most annoying thing in all of this is that the ex-wife put us through this, she overstepped boundaries (again), she put my husband is a position that would make it hard for anyone to say "no" and she made the kids feel uncomfortable by being in my space, a space reserved for our family, the five of us, not the four of them. I can't imagine how awkward that night was for everyone involved, but there is only one person to blame and that's what I've concluded after a few weeks of cooling down.
The lesson is after more than 5 years, she still doesn't understand what boundaries are... and we're not going to teach her.
